that's the plan stan

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.-" James 1:2-4

So as many of you know, I was supposed to be graduating this May, however given my health set backs and transferring my sophomore year...that plan quickly went out the window. If there is anything that the Lord has taught me this past year is that I need to stop planning and be open to what he has in store for me. It has been a hard lesson to learn, and unfortunately most of the time I went kicking and screaming, but now I feel like I have truly come to accept it. This past year has been extremely tough, but through it the Lord has helped me build character. I know who I need to lean on and where I need to seek wisdom from. I learned that there are people God placed in my life who I can lean on, who I can trust, who can make me laugh... To this day when I think about my initial reaction to becoming sick, I am truly ashamed that I didn't trust the Lord in the direction he was about to lead me in, I am ashamed that I took the reigns back from him thinking he clearly didn't know what he was doing, yet I am still stunned that he decided to use that situation to bring himself glory. He restored relationships, created new ones, he helped me develop trust in him (which I have never been great at) and drew me closer to him throughout the entire process. My pastor "twittered" this today and I thought it was such truth, "Sometimes it can be easy for us to overlook the fact that grace can only be experienced in the presence of pain." I have lived out this truth this past year, throughout this process I have realized how much the Lord loves me, by how much grace he allowed me in that painful process, even when I was mad at him, he patiently let me be, all the while proving how faithful he was. I know that in the future I may fall to my flesh and try to take the reigns back to plan again, but I pray that I will always think back to what he has done to show me his character and love. I feel like I trust him enough to know his plans are better than mine and I pray that I will be obedient in always thanking him and looking to bring him glory in all situations.